[ he's going to be furious with her, if he ever finds out. but this is her truth, too, and has nothing to do with kaz's past, or his personal secrets . . . and, really: ]

I want to use the money from the Ice Court, to pay off my contract, buy a ship, and leave Ketterdam. To hunt down slavers. And he asked me to stay.

[ which, by itself, is fine. but: ]

But he would not give me a reason to stay. He just demanded it. And I was angry, and told him that I want him without his armor, or not at all.

[ she exhales, slowly, her eyes still closed. ]

I was tired of being treated like a tool and not like a person.